Another Sunday

Sometimes I think I enjoy Sundays less than any other day of the week because I have so much to do. It's laundry day and lesson plan day and get-some-grading-done day. It's definitely not Funday or Lazy Sunday or anything I would prefer it to be. And I think that's mostly because I have acquired a negative attitude about my job.

Last year, I was surprised to learn that workman's comp only covered injuries incurred during the school day--not before 8:00 or after 3:30, unless one is attending a school event (meeting, open house, etc.). Hmmph. Since I think this is unfair--a district-level decision designed to protect their pocketbooks but not their employees--I've changed my work habits. So even though I will get to school early (between 7:00 and 7:30), I will no longer stay late to work in my classroom. If it doesn't get done at school, it must be done at home so this is really not working so well for me. So this is one factor affecting my attitude.

The other, larger factor is the loss of autonomy I've experienced in the past 3-4 years. For example, I don't have any say-so in how or when I teach reading. I have to have "literacy stations"--no different from the centers I did years ago. Centers didn't work then and they don't work now to make students better readers. Reading makes better readers, but I've had my hand slapped too many times for having my students just read self-selected text instead of doing a center with a product and I've given up. When your princiPal asks you to stop being the "toxic member of the staff", it makes you realize you're tilting at windmills to think that complaining is to going to change the new district vision. The curriculum for all subjects has been mapped and everything must be taught (covered is more like it) before the state assessment. This means that everything has to be taught at a breakneck pace, especially since we have new, more rigorous standards. There is no time to expand or enhance the learning through projects or other activities. It's become all pencil and paper.

I need to give myself a pep talk and quit longing for yesterday. I need to find a way to work the system to be the best teacher I can while teaching in a way that's alien to me. I've been trying to do this, but today it's hard. Tomorrow I'll be back in "sheep mode" and I'll get it done.